Decisions...Decisions

Wow! Lots of things to think about this week.

I met with the plastic surgeon last week. It turns out that this is much more complicated than I ever dreamed it would be. Don't let anyone compare your mastectomy to cosmetic implants. It's much more complicated than that. They have to replace the muscle they take out. I guess I knew that, but hadn't given it much thought. 

So, the plan is to take the muscle from my right shoulder blade area, leave it connected with the arteries and veins under my arm, move it, under the skin, around to the front right side, and reattach it. OWWW! Funny thing is, all I kept thinking the whole time she was telling me this, was whether or not I would ever be able to shoot my bow again. So why didn't I ask about that? Because in the bigger scheme of things, it's really not that important. Let's get the cancer out, then I'll worry about silly things like my bow. Maybe it was just easier to focus on at that moment than the trauma of the surgery.

I had to go directly to the hospital for a sonogram under my arm. It turns out that the radiation treatment I had last time, could have caused my arteries to harden. If that's the case, this surgery cannot be done. I'm still waiting to hear about that. I hate waiting!

The next life changing decision I have an entire week to make, is whether to get saline or silicone.  Seems like a minuscule thing, but it's not. There is a lot to think about. I'll spare you those details, and just say that I decided to go with saline. Eventually, they all leak. Saline, just absorbs into your body, and basically, my right side will deflate. Hmmm, I can hardly wait. Silicone, has to be checked, with an MRI every few years, to be sure it hasn't leaked. My reasoning is, I'm close to retirement age. Do I really want to keep going back and paying for even my co-pay portion of an MRI? I don't think so. Alright, saline it is. 

Or not. More decisions. A friend who very recently lost his wife to breast cancer asked me to reconsider any form of implant.  She had one, years ago. When her cancer returned, they did not see it until it had spread too far. They didn't see it because it was hidden behind the implant. What!? Now why the hell didn't anyone else tell me that! I did some research, and apparently, that happens more often than most people realize. This is important information. I thought I had this all figured out. Now what do I do? Where's my owner's manual?